The indent from your body still permanently rests on the right end of the taupe couch, the one you complained was too soft to be truly comfortable. And it’s the image that accompanies that permanent impression that will always flash to my mind when I look at the right end of the too soft couch.
It’s the image of you, with your feet kicked up to the side, your eyes slowly closing and head drooping as you read the news for the day. It’s the image of you, eating your peanut butter egg sandwich as you watch the morning news on the weekends. It’s the images of you leaping up from your spot when the Packers made a good play. It’s the millions of little images that compile what remains of you. It’s the reminder that all that physically remains of you, is the imprint left on your chair.
Sunday, June 17th, 2012 was the last Father’s Day we ever had the blessing of sharing. It was taken for granted, you were not appreciated in the right way. Now, as the photos of people with their dads flood social media for the day, with the captions that ring with tones of superficial appreciation, I wish that I would have been grateful for you in the right ways. I’m saddened that it took the death of you for us to truly appreciate your giving heart and your soothing presence, instead of being just a deeper set of pockets for us to use when necessary. While it is a blessing to be able to have a father who can do that, it is not why we should appreciate them. They give up so much of their lives to ensure that we have a wonderful, stable life.
What my family would give if we could just say “Hi, Daddy, Happy Father’s Day!” one more time. What we would give to see his smile, hear his voice, his same old jokes and resounding laughter. What my family would give to chat with him and catch up on this Father’s Day is incomprehensible to most, unless they know the same pain.
So for those of you who still are blessed to have your dad, cherish him more than ever because the heartache we know when we see the impression on his vacant chair, is beyond compare.